The Perfect Beer Glass: An Ongoing Saga…

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I am drinking out of a new beer glass. A new “Perfect Beer Glass”.

It has Tooheys New printed on it but I don’t care - it’s a good shape. I like it.

It came from a fabulous shop in Queensland called The Beerless Bar. I know! Normally a concept that would deeply upset and concern me but this shop was GREAT! It had all kinds of bar paraphernalia and it housed my new Perfect Beer Glass. I was in a happy place!

Anyway - back to my new Perfect Beer Glass… it actually came as part of a two pack. Initially I thought - “No good. I only want ONE Perfect Beer Glass.” But after much consideration and browsing I decided that two was probably an economical buy. I thought I would take one glass back home with me and leave the other for safe-keeping with my parents in the event that anything untoward happened to my glass then they could offer a near-immediate replacement.  I also didn’t want two of the same glass in my house because then I wouldn’t have the Perfect Beer Glass I would have One Of Two Possible Perfect Beer Glasses.

I don’t like to share.

And my husband is the clumsiest person I have ever met and I didn’t want to give him the opportunity to destroy two glasses at once.  Interestingly he only seems to be clumsy with my belongings. I can rattle off all sorts of my favourite items - usually and unfortunately made of easliy breakable substances - that have met with a high-impact demise: my favourite vintage blue bowl, my favourite vintage blue plate, one of a set of my four favourite latte mugs, and finally the Absinthe glass that I had imported from the U.S. as a gift for the Husband of Hands with Many Thumbs for Christmas.

I usually hear a dull crack from the kitchen (it’s rarely a spectacular affair) and the quiet but slightly desperate sound of my husband panicking… and then I know. Something else that I love has just bitten the dust.

So, you can now see why I was:

A. reluctant to bring anything into my house that I atually like

and

B. pretty thrilled at the fact that these glasses seemed to be hotel standard and made of 2.5 inch thick bullet-proof glass.

Having said all this I am now obliged to tell you that my new Perfect Beer Glass is still in one piece.

HOWEVER…

it has been put in the dishwasher by someone attempting to be tidy and now the lovely glossy Toohey’s New logo has been eroded to a deeply upsetting matte. It’s so horribly matte that it makes me think of blackboards and hence fingernails scratching down blackboards every time I touch it.

It’s so off-putting that I’m having the second glass sent down as I write.

I can only hope that Husband of Hands with Many Thumbs keeps said hands to himself this time.

I’ll keep you posted…